Sunday, May 4, 2008

Decided to try something new...

I've decided to no longer try and stifle myself. From here on, I will pretty much post whatever i want in here. Hopefully, this means more updates.

So I'm gonna post another slightly humorous story. It could even be called pathetic. Largely pathetic. Anyway, there was this girl that I had a crush on and was trying to be sweet to(which won't be happening again anytime soon - Editor's Note). I was thinking to myself(Thanks Blacklisted!) "What could I do to show my feelings without actually SAYING what my feelings are? I KNOW! I'll do a John Cusack!"

Now, I guess I need to explain this. A John Cusack to me means a mix. Not just any mix. A sweet mix. And there was nothing sweeter in the 1980's than John Cusack. Also, the fact that he was in High Fidelity and that movie couldn't go ten minutes without talking about a playlist or mix has a little to do with it. Normally, a John Cusack is too strong of a move. I only want to do that to a girl that I have known for a while and have really fallen for. Truth be told, to this day, I have never fully completed one John Cusack Mix.

I guess I just gave away an important part, but don't worry, its not that important. Here's why. As I was making the mix, which was on CD because a tape would've been too much too soon, I had an realization. This is too much. Too cute, too sweet, too "two care bears skipping through an enchanted garden on their way to the Rainbow Bridge to the town of Chocoville"-ish. Ok, that last one was a bit of an exaggeration. Yet, it was true. It was too cute. I needed to toughen it up a bit. So, I decided through out the mix to sprinkle in a few hardcore ditties. Not many, but enough. Than, I decided I needed to add a few sad tracks, a few hip-hop track, a few dance tracks, etc. By the time I was done, I only ended up keeping two tracks from the mix I started making. It was still a good mix; but instead of conveying a message, I had just turned it into CD with good tunes on it. By the time I was finished it, I had no time to redo it.

I started making the mix that morning and that night I was going to see the girl. Well, by the time I was done, it was do or die in more ways than one. I know that if I didn't give this girl the CD that night, I never would've. Yet, it was complete to me. It was a tough decision. Either go with it and give her a mix that said nothing or go empty handed except with the knowledge that you have made a mix that you will never give. Like I said, it was do or die.

I decided to burn it and go. I figured that at the least, it'll put me in her mind. Yeah, I know how girls think. Anyway, I wait for it to finish and after I package it up I start on my way. The place I was going to see this girl was a show(duh!). It was also a chance to see my friend Cassie's band. I honestly can't remember much about the bands performance except for the fact that Cassie's mosh calls were way louder than her singing.

Once the band finished up, I sat around and talked to a few friends. Basically, I just worked up the courage to give the girl the mix. Finally, I was about to leave, so I got up and looked around. I saw her finally. I started walking towards her. I start getting nervous. I'm within ten feet of her. Annnnnnnnd.... I change direction. "What am I doing?" I ask myself. I head in Cassie's direction. "CHANGE COURSE!" I scream to myself in my head. I reach into my bag. "NOOOOOOOO!" the voice in my head cries. I give Cassie the mix and walk away. Excellent, right? I chicken out and end up giving my friend the mix I made for that special girl. I walk out, walk home, and end up watching the Flyers lose I believe. I can't remember that detail.

In the end, I think it worked out for the best. The girl I intended the mix for doesn't really talk to me anymore, so that kills any guilt I have for not giving her the mix. Also, it was a crappy mix, so I'm glad I didn't give it to her. Also, Cassie likes it, so that worked out. Like I said, that story is slightly hilarious and very pathetic. If you're interested in the mix, I uploaded it. The links at the end. Thanks!

Mix For A Girl That Was Never Given